Community Guidelines

Trust starts with protecting each other's stories.

Totem is a place for open sharing, but only when people know their vulnerability is respected. Privacy ensures that honesty and authenticity can thrive.

Please do not:

• Reveal the identities of community members
• Record or screenshot Spaces
• Share posts, quotes, or content outside of Totem without clear consent

Everyone deserves to feel safe and respected.

Totem is not a dating site. Any unwanted, inappropriate, or sexualized behavior, whether obvious or subtle, undermines the safety of our Spaces and will not be tolerated.

This includes:

• Sexual comments, jokes, or innuendos
• Flirting, advances, or suggestive behavior
• Requests for intimate photos
• Sharing explicit content without consent
• Bullying or intimidation based on gender or sexuality
• Unwanted nudity in profile photos or shared media

Diversity, respect, and inclusion are core to our community.

Discrimination, hate, or harassment based on identity have no place in Totem. Every member deserves dignity, regardless of race, sexual orientation, gender, ability, religion, or background.

This includes:

• Derogatory or demeaning language
• Stereotyping or slurs
• Disrespectful comments on mental health
• Harassment, threats, or stalking
• Sharing discriminatory or hateful content

The power of Totem is in being heard, not fixed.

Our model of peer support is rooted in sharing experiences, not giving advice or offering diagnoses. Everyone deserves the space to tell their story without interruption or judgment.

Please avoid:

• Speaking without the talking piece
• Interrupting or commenting on someone's share without invitation
• Offering unsolicited advice, solutions, or opinions
• Diagnosing others with medical, psychological, or mental health conditions

Totem is a place for healing, not for selling.

We protect the integrity of our Spaces by keeping them free from self-promotion, marketing, or financial solicitation of any kind.

This includes:

• Promoting businesses, services, or products during or after Spaces
• Using Spaces to find clients or collaborators
• Messaging members for marketing purposes
• Posting links, spam, or promotional content

Showing up matters, both to you and your community.

Spaces are strongest when everyone who signs up participates. Frequent absences affect not only your own experience, but the connections and conversations of the group. If you can't attend, please cancel at least 24 hours in advance.

Totem Spaces depend on participants being present and able to engage with the group.

You are always welcome to pass, listen, or take a moment when you need one. We simply ask that you stay present enough to follow the Space and respond to the Keeper.

Please avoid:

• Ignoring or being unable to follow the Keeper's direction
• Frequently leaving or disappearing without explanation
• Splitting your attention with other activities during the Space
• Joining while too intoxicated to participate safely

Relationships formed through Totem must prioritize safety, respect, and consent.

We encourage genuine friendships, but maintaining boundaries ensures that connection never becomes pressure, discomfort, or harm.

Totem Spaces are built for sincere participation, emotional safety, and mutual respect.

Behavior meant to derail, provoke, or overwhelm a Space breaks the trust our community depends on. We welcome different perspectives, but not participation that's intentionally disruptive or in bad faith.

This includes:

• Impersonating another person, or falsely claiming an identity to join a Space meant for a specific community
• Interrupting, mocking, or provoking other members
• Flooding a Space with repeated comments, links, or unrelated content
• Using offensive, graphic, or shocking language or imagery
• Coordinating with others to disrupt or overwhelm a Space
• Joining to record, expose, ridicule, or harass participants